Kapdagbughotjamappsaf is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, unsympathetic centipede.

Kapdagbughotjamappsaf created an up quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kapdagbughotjamappsaf, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Kapdagbughotjamappsaf, it will refuse to believe in you.

Kapdagbughotjamappsaf's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Kapdagbughotjamappsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sing in public.

2. Never wear jumpers.

3. Do not dye your hair magenta.

4. Never talk about eagles.

5. Always pray immersed in water.