Yokbagceb is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, temperamental spider.

Yokbagceb created an electron six million years ago.

If you believe in Yokbagceb, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Yokbagceb, it will throw large rocks at you.

Yokbagceb's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Yokbagceb's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick sharks.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.