Luntafyak is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, omnipotent crab.

Luntafyak created a quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Luntafyak, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Luntafyak, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Luntafyak's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Luntafyak's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed bread to foxes while wearing white dresses.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. You must pray to Luntafyak eight times a day.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate geese.

5. Learn seven new languages a year.