Ominlarpnar is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, bad-tempered bee.

Ominlarpnar created parasitic wasps three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ominlarpnar, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Ominlarpnar, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Ominlarpnar's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Ominlarpnar's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your face indigo.

2. Always help great tits in need.

3. Learn four new languages a year.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

5. Never hurt dogs.