Ladhogced is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, generous unicorn.

Ladhogced created an up quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ladhogced, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Ladhogced, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Ladhogced's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Ladhogced's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Always look after injured seals.

5. Never sing in the presence of mites.