Tamtensomfotdin is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, competent squid.

Tamtensomfotdin created the planet Mars five million years ago.

If you believe in Tamtensomfotdin, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Tamtensomfotdin, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Tamtensomfotdin's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Tamtensomfotdin's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tamtensomfotdin.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never talk about dark energy.

4. Tamtensomfotdin loves nematodes, so they must be honoured.

5. You must love Tamtensomfotdin.