Fligortlamdobbarnsin is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, awesome goat.

Fligortlamdobbarnsin created Africa nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fligortlamdobbarnsin, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Fligortlamdobbarnsin, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Fligortlamdobbarnsin's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Fligortlamdobbarnsin's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Never mention seals.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate tortoises.

4. Always look after injured cats.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.