Loggessyokcubragkonhaprot is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, irritating fly.

Loggessyokcubragkonhaprot created tapeworms eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Loggessyokcubragkonhaprot, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Loggessyokcubragkonhaprot, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Loggessyokcubragkonhaprot's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Loggessyokcubragkonhaprot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep six goats in a large pit.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never wear hats.

4. Never feed lots of beans to tapirs while wearing pink trousers.

5. Always pray immersed in water.