Haslegflan is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, narcissistic donkey.

Haslegflan created the Sun three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Haslegflan, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Haslegflan, it will turn you into a dog.

Haslegflan's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Haslegflan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never chant in holy places.

3. Feed all hungry dogs.

4. Never think ill of sick birds.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.