Gessinglun is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, fast donkey.

Gessinglun created a bottom quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gessinglun, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Gessinglun, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Gessinglun's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Gessinglun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not wear indigo clothing.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never run in the presence of tortoises.