Gadhasmig Vagmitlog is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, capable coyote.

Gadhasmig Vagmitlog created life three million years ago.

If you believe in Gadhasmig Vagmitlog, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Gadhasmig Vagmitlog, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Gadhasmig Vagmitlog's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Gadhasmig Vagmitlog's Holy Commandments

1. Erect three zinc sculptures of Gadhasmig Vagmitlog on top of important buildings.

2. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never laugh in the presence of voles.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never talk about comets.