Tikjoplen is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, selfish frog.

Tikjoplen created life nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Tikjoplen, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tikjoplen, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Tikjoplen's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Tikjoplen's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about fluid mechanics.

2. Never talk about spacetime.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not eat cherries.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.