Bonfemyart is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, resourceful pigeon.

Bonfemyart created Asia five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bonfemyart, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bonfemyart, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Bonfemyart's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Bonfemyart's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about gravity.

2. Run away if eight eagles approach from the west.

3. Learn six new languages a year.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Monkeys are not to be trusted.