Stanmumwip is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, unselfish parrot.

Stanmumwip created an up quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stanmumwip, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Stanmumwip, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Stanmumwip's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Stanmumwip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Hide from mauve grasshopers for they are unholy.