Bim is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, slow whale.

Bim created the planet Mars seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bim, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bim, it will turn you into a rat.

Bim's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Bim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never feed cherries to turtles while wearing shoes.

5. Never talk about quantum mechanics near grasshopers while wearing magenta corsets.