Rippan is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, unjust slug.

Rippan created silver five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rippan, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Rippan, she will ignore you.

Rippan's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Rippan's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Worship no other gods but Rippan.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never wear corsets.

5. Do not covet oxen.