Xemfaszig is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, duplicitous cobra.

Xemfaszig created life six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xemfaszig, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Xemfaszig, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Xemfaszig's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Xemfaszig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Gulls are not to be trusted.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate horses.

5. Always help sick capybaras.