Wanbamhat is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, grumpy dingo.

Wanbamhat created parasitic wasps four years ago.

If you believe in Wanbamhat, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Wanbamhat, he will manifest in front of you.

Wanbamhat's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Wanbamhat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dolphins.

2. Never feed lots of lentils to tapirs while wearing pink scarves.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Wanbamhat.

4. Run away if four geese approach from the south.

5. Learn nine new languages a year.