Nurlsabhigwadbugtunven is a god.

He takes the form of a large, compassionate chinchilla.

Nurlsabhigwadbugtunven created the Large Magellanic Cloud five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlsabhigwadbugtunven, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Nurlsabhigwadbugtunven, he will refuse to believe in you.

Nurlsabhigwadbugtunven's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Nurlsabhigwadbugtunven's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed bananas to sharks while wearing tights.

2. Always wear blue.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Always help tortoises.

5. Always pray immersed in water.