Fenligcidbassarffigrut is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, omnipotent raccoon.

Fenligcidbassarffigrut created dark energy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fenligcidbassarffigrut, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Fenligcidbassarffigrut, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Fenligcidbassarffigrut's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Fenligcidbassarffigrut's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick tortoises.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate badgers.

4. Do not wear yellow clothing.

5. Do not listen to music.