Bedstipmad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, pitiless tortoise.

Bedstipmad created carbon five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bedstipmad, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Bedstipmad, it will cry a lot.

Bedstipmad's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Bedstipmad's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Erect a giant blue sculpture of Bedstipmad in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not wear gray clothing.

5. Never leap near turtles.