Jinpakleggod is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, unfair chinchilla.

Jinpakleggod created humanity five billion years ago.

If you believe in Jinpakleggod, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Jinpakleggod, he will throw large rocks at you.

Jinpakleggod's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Jinpakleggod's Holy Commandments

1. Always help seals in need.

2. Do not wear white clothing.

3. Never eat figs.

4. Do not kill whales.

5. Never look at galaxies.