Wigwonwad Kabcussbadzan is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, merciless cow.

Wigwonwad Kabcussbadzan created the Cigar Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wigwonwad Kabcussbadzan, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Wigwonwad Kabcussbadzan, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Wigwonwad Kabcussbadzan's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Wigwonwad Kabcussbadzan's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint near cats.

2. Never run in holy places.

3. Retreat if four pigs approach from the south.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate badgers.

5. Always help sick aardvarks.