Bemnulmob is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, fast finch.

Bemnulmob created the cosmos eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bemnulmob, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Bemnulmob, she will turn you into a sheep.

Bemnulmob's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Bemnulmob's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about thermodynamics near manatees while wearing magenta shoes and balancing six silicon spheres on your head.

2. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Bemnulmob in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never sit near swans.

4. Always help turtles in need.

5. Feed all hungry mites.