Cadfemarnontbog is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, benevolent alligator.

Cadfemarnontbog created light five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cadfemarnontbog, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Cadfemarnontbog, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Cadfemarnontbog's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Cadfemarnontbog's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about asteroids.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Hide from gray nematodes for they are unholy.