Stanwotleg is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, compassionate armadillo.

Stanwotleg created a quark two years ago.

If you believe in Stanwotleg, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Stanwotleg, she will turn you into a duck.

Stanwotleg's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Stanwotleg's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate squirrels.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

3. Never talk about dark energy near voles while wearing yellow shoes.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Sheep are unholy and should not be approached.