Tiphonbus is a god.
He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, temperamental
bat.
Tiphonbus created the planet Earth four trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Tiphonbus, he will answer your prayers.
If you do not believe in
Tiphonbus, he will have a low opinion of you.
Tiphonbus' most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.
Tiphonbus' Holy Commandments1. Do not stand on grass.
2. Never talk about gravity near bats while wearing violet scarves and balancing three zinc spheres on your hands.
3. Never feed parsnips to great tits while wearing ear rings.
4. Never pour water over plants.
5. Always wear pink.