Betcapyambog is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, competent scorpion.

Betcapyambog created a strange quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Betcapyambog, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Betcapyambog, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Betcapyambog's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Betcapyambog's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near grasshopers while wearing indigo shorts.

3. Always obey Betcapyambog's priests.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. You must love Betcapyambog.