Yat Zakdisssinbelljat is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, idiotic squid.

Yat Zakdisssinbelljat created matter seven million years ago.

If you believe in Yat Zakdisssinbelljat, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Yat Zakdisssinbelljat, he will remove you from existence.

Yat Zakdisssinbelljat's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Yat Zakdisssinbelljat's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Do not sit in public.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not listen to music.