Jangilvag is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, omnipotent tortoise.

Jangilvag created light eight million years ago.

If you believe in Jangilvag, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Jangilvag, he will not care.

Jangilvag's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Jangilvag's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never talk about archaea.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not eat peanuts.