Hakpintap is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, smart lion.

Hakpintap created a down quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hakpintap, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Hakpintap, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Hakpintap's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Hakpintap's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Hakpintap.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Do not drink water in purple rooms.

4. Learn six new languages a year.

5. Never think about ultrasonics near dogs while wearing blue dresses and balancing four tin spheres on your back.