Hatdidpod is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, grumpy porpoise.

Hatdidpod created the cosmos eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hatdidpod, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Hatdidpod, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Hatdidpod's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Hatdidpod's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Hatdidpod.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Put Hatdidpod first in all things.