Bepbarnhak is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, resourceful walrus.

Bepbarnhak created the Black Eye Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bepbarnhak, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Bepbarnhak, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Bepbarnhak's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Bepbarnhak's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your chest violet.

2. You must pray to Bepbarnhak nine times a day.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never sprint near seals.

5. Never go into magenta rooms.