Bamzedstik is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, awe-inspiring troll.

Bamzedstik created dark energy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bamzedstik, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Bamzedstik, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Bamzedstik's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Bamzedstik's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Hide from blue nematodes for they are unholy.

4. Bamzedstik loves porpoises, so they must be respected.

5. Never look in ponds.