Cutontdob Larnripwapbep is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, wise deer.

Cutontdob Larnripwapbep created energy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cutontdob Larnripwapbep, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Cutontdob Larnripwapbep, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Cutontdob Larnripwapbep's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Cutontdob Larnripwapbep's Holy Commandments

1. Cutontdob Larnripwapbep loves dolphins, so they must be honoured.

2. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not shave your neck.

4. Never talk about nebulae.

5. Never feed lots of parsnips to rats while wearing green hats.