Govhadlidcubjin is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, caring mouse.

Govhadlidcubjin created humanity two million years ago.

If you believe in Govhadlidcubjin, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Govhadlidcubjin, she will turn you into a rat.

Govhadlidcubjin's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Govhadlidcubjin's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark energy.

2. Never feed turnips to cats while wearing dresses.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always make sure there are no whales in a building before entering it.

5. Never play with disobedient children.