Bimdissgupvon Flisquimnart is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, unthoughtful mongoose.

Bimdissgupvon Flisquimnart created Africa four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bimdissgupvon Flisquimnart, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bimdissgupvon Flisquimnart, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Bimdissgupvon Flisquimnart's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Bimdissgupvon Flisquimnart's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Bimdissgupvon Flisquimnart on top of all buildings.

3. Never write about ultrasonics.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never paint your hands violet.