Rotzaklarpgidflig is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, awesome finch.

Rotzaklarpgidflig created a top quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Rotzaklarpgidflig, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Rotzaklarpgidflig, he will turn you into a snail.

Rotzaklarpgidflig's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Rotzaklarpgidflig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never mention goats.

4. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

5. Do not make images of living things.