Neldidcad is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, dishonourable seal.

Neldidcad created the planet Mars four million years ago.

If you believe in Neldidcad, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Neldidcad, he will remove you from existence.

Neldidcad's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Neldidcad's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Never go into brown rooms.

4. Do not wear silicon on your body.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.