Wotfomxuck is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, stupid swan.

Wotfomxuck created the world six million years ago.

If you believe in Wotfomxuck, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Wotfomxuck, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Wotfomxuck's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Wotfomxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from pink swans for they are unholy.

2. Never leap in the presence of manatees.

3. Do not sit in public.

4. Wotfomxuck loves geese, so they must be respected.

5. Never paint your neck gray.