Yarlgomkim is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, quiet raccoon.

Yarlgomkim created an electron three million years ago.

If you believe in Yarlgomkim, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Yarlgomkim, it will come to you in dreams.

Yarlgomkim's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Yarlgomkim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Never talk about gravity near birds while wearing cyan dresses and balancing three copper spheres on your arms.

4. Do not hurt voles.

5. Do not commit murder.