Bonkrillib is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, emotional wolf.

Bonkrillib created a Higgs boson four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bonkrillib, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bonkrillib, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Bonkrillib's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Bonkrillib's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fluid mechanics near moths while wearing brown coats and balancing eight platinum spheres on your legs.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Bonkrillib on top of all buildings.

4. Run away from black capybaras, for they are unholy.

5. Always look after injured doves.