Madhanmig is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, omniscient horse.

Madhanmig created everything that exists four million years ago.

If you believe in Madhanmig, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Madhanmig, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Madhanmig's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Madhanmig's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if four pigs approach from the west.

2. You must pray to Madhanmig nine times a day.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never eat rice.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.