Dabhammip is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, charitable gorilla.

Dabhammip created a bottom quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dabhammip, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dabhammip, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Dabhammip's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Dabhammip's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dabhammip.

2. Always obey Dabhammip's priests.

3. Do not take Dabhammip's name in vain.

4. Never feed melons to turtles while wearing red dresses.

5. Never feed cucumbers to monkeys while wearing coats.