Dutwapsaf is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, wise beaver.

Dutwapsaf created Mount Everest four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dutwapsaf, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Dutwapsaf, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Dutwapsaf's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Dutwapsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate cats.

4. Dutwapsaf must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not drink water in gray rooms.