Getcetcanceb is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, staggering cat.

Getcetcanceb created humanity six billion years ago.

If you believe in Getcetcanceb, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Getcetcanceb, she will jump up and down on your head.

Getcetcanceb's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Getcetcanceb's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Getcetcanceb.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Retreat if six whales approach from the east.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Always take life seriously.