Bosstaf is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, narcissistic squid.

Bosstaf created matter five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bosstaf, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bosstaf, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Bosstaf's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Bosstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Hide if three aardvarks approach from the south.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never talk about turtles.

5. Retreat if four dogs approach from the north.