Jabgovbet is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, cheerful hamster.

Jabgovbet created an up quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jabgovbet, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Jabgovbet, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Jabgovbet's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Jabgovbet's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear cyan.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Put Jabgovbet first in all things.

4. Never think about quantum gravity near sheep while wearing yellow tights and balancing nine titanium spheres on your arms.

5. Do not wear blue clothing.