Bidflampan is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, moody dolphin.

Bidflampan created an electron seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bidflampan, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bidflampan, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Bidflampan's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Bidflampan's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Bidflampan.

2. Never talk about dark matter near ants while wearing indigo stockings.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate rats.

4. Pray towards the south.

5. Grasshopers are not to be trusted.