Ganrannill Zedvolvab is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, unthoughtful armadillo.

Ganrannill Zedvolvab created silver eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ganrannill Zedvolvab, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Ganrannill Zedvolvab, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Ganrannill Zedvolvab's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Ganrannill Zedvolvab's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never talk about gravity.

3. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.